Memphis stood up and screamed real loud. He screamed at God for allowing him to be born. He scream at Satan. He bent down toward the ground with his fist shaking at Satan and scream, "come and get me! I'll will take over!" Then, he faced grandma. Memphis screamed, "You wrinkled face whore! I will never step foot on your property as long as you are alive. You bitch! When you die, I will dance a jig on your grave. I will spit, piss, and crap on your grave. I will sing ding dong the wicked bitch is dead!" He continued to scream at her with anger and rage. Finally, he stopped and there was a long moment of silence. What could be said? The truth was revealed and everyone knew nothing could be said to change it. They walked to the car for the drive home. His mom did not say a word to him for that out burst of profanity. The drive was a silent one home. Memphis sat in the back seat of the car simmering in anger. At that moment he made a vow to himself, that the world will not see him cry. Also, he would not get overly excited or display it. For the fear of it not being true or taken away a moments notice. Memphis never stepped foot on grandmother's property again. Anytime they went to visit her, He would sit in the car. They never made him get out of the car. They let him just sit there. After a couple of years grandmother was moved into his mother's house.
One day at the age of 15 after a series of events in Memphis's life, he apologized to his grandmother for his actions on that day. He realized that anger and hatred would destroy him as well. She accepted but there was still a big barrier between them. Memphis was now 20 years old and was taking a trip to California and needed to pay for the tickets that day to lock in the low price. He was selling some stock that he had accumulated , but since digital transfer was not around at this time. It would be a week before he received the money for them. So, Memphis went to his mom for the money. He told her that she would be paid back as soon as the check for the stocks arrived. Well, as luck would have it. She did not have the money. She said, "ask your grandmother." He cringed at the thought. He did not want to ask her for anything. He took a deep breath and a large gulp swallowing his pride. He slowly walked into the smokey den were she sat. He explained to her what he was doing and he needed the $800 today to get the tickets. She slowly took a drag of the cigarette and replied, "alright go get my purse." She wrote Memphis the check. A week later he came back with the $800 dollars that he borrowed. He did not want to be indebted to her because he was wanting to prove that he was not worthless and no good. Well, a few years passed and grandmother had become seriously ill. She was in the hospital and Memphis came to visit. She slowly opened her eyes to see who walked into her room. Memphis says, "Hi grandma, how are you feeling?" She replied,"as good as can be expected. I reckon." They talked for awhile about everyday things. Then she asked Memphis to hold her hand. Memphis reached for her hand and she gentle grasp his hand. She squeezed it tighter and patted his hand. Then she said, "Memphis I'm so sorry on how I treated you. You are not worthless and no good. You are the only one that never wanted anything from me. And when you borrowed something you pay it back on the day you agreed to. Memphis I'm proud of you. You are a fine young man. Can you forgive me? I love you." Memphis replied, "grandma I forgave you along time ago. I love you." As he got ready to leave, grandma grabs his hand. She squeezes it firmly and says, " I love you son".
Grandma passed away early the next morning. The last words that were spoken between Memphis and grandma was I love you. He learned that you have to go the distance. He learn that it does not matter what someone thinks. As long as you know the truth and are comfortable with it. With time all things will get answered. He finally heard the words he wanted to hear. He needed to hear. Memphis finally found some peace.
PS. This is the condense version. I felt maybe it was getting too long for a blog. Who knows maybe I will visit with Memphis again.
See ya,
dog gone
Dogman707
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