Monday, January 6, 2014

Things You Should Never Do

1. Never use an old plumber's handkerchief.

Why? Old Joe, me, and the new guy David were at the job site. David was getting ready for lunch and needing to wipe some grease off his hand before he ate lunch. His asked old Joe if he could borrow his handkerchief to wipe it off. I tried to tell him not to do that. David did not listen to me. Later, that day on the way back to the office. We stopped at a McDonald's to get something to drink and use the restroom. Well, Joe and David were at the urinals. David's jaw dropped when he saw old Joe pull out the handkerchief and wiped the remaining drops of urine from his pecker. David could not wash his hands enough.

I tried to warn David. So never use an old plumber's handkerchief. For that matter no old man's handkerchief.

2. Never ever use your bare hands when repairing a commode. It is best to have disposable gloves on your hands. We received a call about a stopped up commode. We had trouble getting the plumber's snake to move freely in and out of the commode. We had to remove the toilet from the floor to check for cracks in it. We drained the water out the tank and bowl. As my boss raised the toilet off its setting and tilted it for me to look at the underside with a flashlight and my knife in hand. I noticed a black disc in the goose neck of the toilet. What the hell! I then looked on the shelf above the toilet and there it was an Oil of OLay jar without its lid. The woman had dropped the lid into the commode and did not tell the landlord. So, I proceeded with my bare hands to poke the lid out into the bowl. Well, faith would have it the lid flip and out plopped a turd into my Bare hand. AGGHHHH!!!! What the Hell! My boss started to laugh and said, "Dog she's a beautiful brunette." I told him, "I don't give a rat's ass how beautiful she was. I was Not going to hold her turds."  I said, "It looks like she had peanuts or corn last night for supper. Since, its lunch time. Do you want it? I should have used my knife to poke the lid back out

3. Never use a plumber's knife.

Why? See #2  Plumber's use their knives for nasty stuff.

4. Never/Ever be a smart ass to your boss. It could be a long walk home or pay check could be a little smaller. Or worse more turds in the hand.

see ya

dog gone

Dogman707